The Anchor
Steady, loyal and slow to complain
You let the other person choose the restaurant, the film and the holiday, and you are fine with it. In an argument your voice stays level, you listen to the whole complaint and you answer the question that was asked. You want a shared life with a joint account, Sunday lunch with the family and plans for the next few years. What you rarely do is say when something has worn you out.
Superpowers
- Calm in a fight: when voices rise you keep yours level, and the conversation usually comes back to the actual problem.
- Follow through: if you said you would pay the bill, collect the kids or call the family, it gets done without a reminder.
- Easy to plan with: you go along with most choices, so weekends and holidays get decided without a row.
Uncalibrated blind spot
Keeping the cost to yourself
You take on extra work, extra visits and other people's bad moods without mentioning it, because that seems easier than raising it. The person with you assumes it costs you nothing. Months later you are short tempered or distant, and they have no idea where it came from.